After Lord of the Rings

"What about his legs? he wont be needing those" I woke up this morning with the idea of beginning a modern drama with those lines and set as the two actors playing orks and goblins in that scene complete their most poignant part to play in the whole movie and following their real lives off set to reveal not so exciting but somewhat interesting lives. Why? because it's what I wondered at that part of the movie whereas most of the movie I pondered how annoying Frodo is, how handsome Aragorn and Legolas are and how much I appreciate someone like Gandalf.

Too old for crime

How do old men survive long enough to become old crime bosses? The thought came to me while I was on the train and I saw an older man greet a young thug with all the various hand shake signals fervor that befits a teen gangster and the thought entered my head that they might know each other from being gang related. Its probably a stretch but my imagination is expansive. Gang related activity came to mind because of the style of handshake I thought I might have recognized as well as the high probability seeing as they were hispanic in origin. Maybe a stereotypical thing but in my neighborhood I've seen some things quite resembling gang initiation. You may think like me - It seems highly unlikely that an old person would be suitable to that lifestyle and if at all it is true that an old person is involved in a gang I think the odds are that he either has established years of loyal goons or he himself is/was a loyal goon. But we've all seen the mafia movies where the old boss eventually gets overthrown by the younger one unless of course he had a son he was grooming for the position. Still there's no guarantee of loyalty when it comes to power struggles. Just imagine though that an older man wanted to make the 'career' switch late in life. I'm sure it would be too difficult to juggle the hectic pace of keeping alert for cops while making sure he took all his Simvastatin and when exactly would he be able to take his Aricept pill before bedtime if bedtime doesn't come or ends up being really late. Just think for a moment what it would take. My mum started going to bed at 6pm after a certain age. Apparently it's called sundowning especially in cases of early dementia. It would be an hilarious idea for a screenplay - elderly Tony Montana who swears all the time yes but has all the ailments and eccentricities related to aging while his goons and minions try to figure out what he really wants as he could never remember that he has said the same thing to them everyday for the last 6 months. Its funny but life is funny in a heartbreaking sort of way. My misfortune and heartache can be a bestseller and movie in a few years. Growing old is no exception as families deal with the changes to their beloved parents providing fodder for many a laughing moment in the later years as we recant stories to the younger ones who will never appreciate them...So back to being too old for crime - I think its probably the best time for crime because you don't have much time. What are they going to give you? life?! yeah we could only be so lucky in our older years. Plus if you look old, half cripple and senile then who'd believe you were in charge? Alright so now you know what I'd be doing in my late years. My mum has become a pilferer of sweet and low artificial sweetener packets. If my mum weren't suffering from dementia she would be appalled at me telling this but she'd never done this before to my knowledge and thus can attribute it to her failing brain. Plus she seems to care less now for what people think than ever before. If she desperately needed to "pass water", she would do it on the street expecting that people would naturally avert their eyes as befits decent respectable people because it's just wrong to stare.
There's also a matter of guilty conscience that older folks just don't seem to have anymore. They've tended to make peace with all their youthful wrongdoing by then and have forgiven all those involved and especially their selves. Im usually quite amazed at the spiritual clarity with which my mum explains things while she couldn't tell you what happened in the last 2 minutes.

LBD challenge

An article on ecouterre featured a group of ladies in the fashion industry who devised a style challenge that aimed at creating different looks using the LBD designed by Eliza Starbuck via The Uniform Project. I looked them over and decided it was a toss up for me between http://tinyurl.com/LEAH-CHERNIKOFF and http://tinyurl.com/JOHANNA-BJORK. I woke up next morning and was motivated to try my own dress up session. I found a LBD in my closet that I had never worn mainly because before now it would not have fitted. I really wanted to be able to allow voting capability but lo it is not within this google bloggabilities.

All the... dumb things

The thought came to mind this morning of something a past roommate said to me in conversation. I was advising her that after showering she should run the bathroom fan for approximately 20 mins after to get the moisture out (at least that's what I've been told). She then said that she was so glad we had a fan and that her last apartment didn't have a bathroom fan she continued to exclaim questioningly "could you believe a bathroom not having a bath fan?!" I was dumbfounded a little but managed to chime in supportingly something to the effect "like yah that's unheard of" oh the horror! I mocked sarcastically in my head till this day. So when you think people forget the dumb things we say- no, it just may be what they remember most.

Green is good

This year has been a green year. I have been looking for signs of green because everything that has been green has turned out to be a good thing for me. It all started when I moved in to my new apartment and someone gifted a pot set that they were getting rid of and it was all enameled green. It was so cute and suited me just fine. Since then all throughout the year I had met with green things for my kitchen all gifted. Then it applied to something totally unexpected when I was searching for internet service and I didn't want Verizon or AT&T/Comcast (you can't fool me) both of which I have sworn off years ago as being terrible companies on principle and customer service. I also don't believe in cable. It's a hoax! plus television isn't any good these days and robs us of our creativity. So I started searching for something like a start-up company with smarts. I thought in this day and age of ipods and innovation, dsl must be outdated and that's when I came across CLEAR. The website looked professional, had green everywhere and here they were offering 4G using WiMax technology! when last I heard Verizon only had 3G. It sounded like the future to me exactly the kind of innovation I knew was out there. To explain the 4G techno a little I borrowed the following explanation from Wikipedia:

"The nomenclature of the generations generally refers to a change in the fundamental nature of the service, non-backwards compatible transmission technology, higher spectral bandwidth and new frequency bands. New generations have appeared about every ten years since the first move from 1981 analog (1G) to digital (2G) transmission in 1992. This was followed, in 2001, by 3G multi-media support, spread spectrum transmission and at least 200 kbit/s, in 2011 expected to be followed by 4G, which refers to all-IP packet-switched networks, mobile ultra-broadband (gigabit speed) access and multi-carrier transmission."

WiMax (Worldwide Interoperability for Microwave Access) on the other hand well that simply allowed lifting the constraints of wires and cables. Bottom line - bigger and better.  Signing up was a breeze. I had the choice of purchasing my device or leasing it and they didnt have to call my preschool principal to verify that I was me and that I was honest about it. They simply posted at the interaction "because that's how we roll". I was thrilled. I purchased my device, signed up and when it came in the mail, I plugged it in usb and voila! I was on like corn. Thanks to Craig McCaw the Steve Jobs in telecommuinications.

The eternal denim Jacket

Is it really eternal? Is it out? Is it ever? Should the wearers be be told to stop? I have recently pondered these questions because lately pairing a denim jacket with a pair of jeans brings to mind eighties multicolored tube socks and one-sided pony-tails with bangs (although that's making a comeback too). I cringe at the sight of women 30 and up wearing the combination really. Which makes me think - when is it ok to wear a denim jacket? Is it that the design makes the difference? Does it belong to the young only? I can't imagine grandma wearing a denim jacket unless she's gardening or is the regular hippie. I've been reconsidering the popularity of jeans altogether and wondering if there is anything that might replace it as the most worn article of clothing ever. Well... what makes a pair of jeans the go to piece of clothing no matter the occasion? seems to be these days it's worn to restaurants, theatre, opera house, the Board room...just about any and everywhere. Think, durability-jeans last forever and if not forever a darn long time! blending ability - jeans go with every fashion dressed up or down and with any color, chameleon ability - it takes on many forms (hmmm jeans underwear anyone?)

Shoe Snob

I've become a shoe snob. At some point in my recent life I developed an aversion to shoe shopping. Don't get me wrong I love to admire shoes; I might go crazy over a new style or even design one in my head or dream of having a shoe company but that soon turns into a slow churning feeling of needing to expel my lunch. It gets worse when I go shopping for shoes. It has seriously baffled me as to what has occurred in my psyche. I have reasoned that it could be associated with the lack of comfortable shoes wherein shoe wearers these days always have to sacrifice comfort for style; or maybe it's my inability to withstand the stilt walking heights heels have gone to when I can't even bear to walk in 2 inches. But then again I have also developed malcontent and boredom of shopping even for clothing. It might have started when my shoe loving -bordering on hoarding that could soon enough warrant an episode of the program Hoarders on A&E- aunt Gloria (recall your favorite Gloria song here mine being by U2) offered me a look into her stash to pick out any I liked. I recall an ecstatic cry as I dove in like a contestant on Supermarket sweep then I picked so many that I eventually paused as my eyes dilated and inside me something changed. I dropped most of the ones I picked and chose a few rather simple ones turned my back on the rest and never looked back. I have since never feigned any excitement except for a mere appreciative comment on a particularly interesting design and color. Another issue I have with shoes is lack of arch cushioning because my arches seem to be high and the pressure places can shift your bones and cause bunion forming and bone pain. All in all I really would like to design shoes with both fashion sense and common sense but it may be a dreamscape.