How do old men survive long enough to become old crime bosses? The thought came to me while I was on the train and I saw an older man greet a young thug with all the various hand shake signals fervor that befits a teen gangster and the thought entered my head that they might know each other from being gang related. Its probably a stretch but my imagination is expansive. Gang related activity came to mind because of the style of handshake I thought I might have recognized as well as the high probability seeing as they were hispanic in origin. Maybe a stereotypical thing but in my neighborhood I've seen some things quite resembling gang initiation. You may think like me - It seems highly unlikely that an old person would be suitable to that lifestyle and if at all it is true that an old person is involved in a gang I think the odds are that he either has established years of loyal goons or he himself is/was a loyal goon. But we've all seen the mafia movies where the old boss eventually gets overthrown by the younger one unless of course he had a son he was grooming for the position. Still there's no guarantee of loyalty when it comes to power struggles. Just imagine though that an older man wanted to make the 'career' switch late in life. I'm sure it would be too difficult to juggle the hectic pace of keeping alert for cops while making sure he took all his Simvastatin and when exactly would he be able to take his Aricept pill before bedtime if bedtime doesn't come or ends up being really late. Just think for a moment what it would take. My mum started going to bed at 6pm after a certain age. Apparently it's called sundowning especially in cases of early dementia. It would be an hilarious idea for a screenplay - elderly Tony Montana who swears all the time yes but has all the ailments and eccentricities related to aging while his goons and minions try to figure out what he really wants as he could never remember that he has said the same thing to them everyday for the last 6 months. Its funny but life is funny in a heartbreaking sort of way. My misfortune and heartache can be a bestseller and movie in a few years. Growing old is no exception as families deal with the changes to their beloved parents providing fodder for many a laughing moment in the later years as we recant stories to the younger ones who will never appreciate them...So back to being too old for crime - I think its probably the best time for crime because you don't have much time. What are they going to give you? life?! yeah we could only be so lucky in our older years. Plus if you look old, half cripple and senile then who'd believe you were in charge? Alright so now you know what I'd be doing in my late years. My mum has become a pilferer of sweet and low artificial sweetener packets. If my mum weren't suffering from dementia she would be appalled at me telling this but she'd never done this before to my knowledge and thus can attribute it to her failing brain. Plus she seems to care less now for what people think than ever before. If she desperately needed to "pass water", she would do it on the street expecting that people would naturally avert their eyes as befits decent respectable people because it's just wrong to stare.
There's also a matter of guilty conscience that older folks just don't seem to have anymore. They've tended to make peace with all their youthful wrongdoing by then and have forgiven all those involved and especially their selves. Im usually quite amazed at the spiritual clarity with which my mum explains things while she couldn't tell you what happened in the last 2 minutes.
